I know I said I was taking a break, but once I got thinking about this, I just had to write it down to get it out of me.
There’s a post on TKAsomething, where a raider was asking what he should do since his raiding schedule has been reduced due to real life issues. He’s feeling that he’s being left behind. I just wanted to warn about the idea of flat out dropping raiding for more than a month or 2.
Way back, my guild was on MC and starting BWL. I was doing 2 of the 3 raids every week and the officers liked my skills enough to over look my green gear even at that progression stage. I was even helping the class leader with itemization priority issues and helping recruits gear up. Then, my baby girl arrived, and raiding was flat out.
I still showed up for an hour or two a couple nights a week to shoot the breeze and was very active on the guild forums. Durning that time the guild also hit a road block in progression and had to rebuild a bit. I got an occasional /w from a new person, but it still felt like my guild.
Eventually, I talked my wife into giving me a night each week where I had no baby responsibilities. Excited, I signed up for the next raid night. The guild was actually not as progressed as before and was doing onyxia and starting MC, when I had previously done Domo/Rag/Razorgore for several months and I had gotten my Rhok in that time, so I thought I was in for sure. Logged in an hour early, asked where we were meeting (thereamore), and was told invites would go out according to forum sign-ups (I was the second hunter to sign after the new CL). We also only had a 40 spot vent server so only raiders were allowed to be on.
I wait. About 30min before start people show up, I ask my class leader if invites are going out and he says only CLs right now. I wait a few min, more show up. I went to check mail and get my pots. It’s still 10min before raid time, but when return to the FP meet area, everyone is gone. I /w my CL and ask what happened
CL: “You had to sign up on the forums.”
Me: “I did its 2 posts after yours.”
CL: “oh… who are you again.”
Me: “I’m Znodis. Same name as used on the forums.”
CL: “Well, sign up for tomorrow and I’ll make sure you get in.”
Me: “I can’t go tomorrow. I only get one night a week to off to play.”
CL: “Hold on we’re starting our attempt.”
CL: “We wiped. I talked to the RL and he says you can swap before MC.”
<I wait 45 min more in Thereamore before realizing people would hearth to IF instead of taking the boat to get to MC.>
>CL 60 (hunter) <guild> Molten Core
Me: “Um. What’s going on?”
Me: “What happened to the swap?”
CL: “What do you mean?”
Me: “Am I going to be able to raid tonight? You said I could swap in before MC.”
CL: “I just asked the RL and he agrees that it’s not a good idea to swap. Just sign up for tomorrow.”
Me: “I already freaking told you I can’t make it tomorrow. You could have told me I couldn’t come an hour ago and I wouldn’t be so upset.”
CL: “Sorry, I guess.”
<Heads back to town.>
Me: “Just so you know. I am not satisfied with this resolution, and will bring this up with the guild leadership.”
<I logout so hot with anger that theres a good chance of actual fire was shooting out of my eyes.>
That was the actual conversation. It’s still burned in my memory. My first night back and I spend 2 of the 4 hours waiting for an invite that never came.
On the forums, I privately messaged the raid leader and the guild leaders who I knew pretty well and had chatted with often during my downtime. I knew all of them well enough to know their real names, and considered them as close to friends as you can get online. I figured that I’d at least get “Sorry Z, good to have you back. We’ll make sure you get into the next raid you can make.”
Instead, I got the curt message saying they would discuss it at the next leadership meeting next week. I asked a few weeks later if anything was resolved seeing as I happened to be out of town that next week, but got a reply of “I don’t remember. By the way, are you new here?” That was it. I didn’t even bother to reply. Eventually, the guild blew up due to the 40-man to 10-man to 25-man raid progression in BC, and I transferred servers to play with my brother (who I freaking bought WoW for, but didn’t sign up on my server).
The lesson here folks is that friends on WoW are not real friends. Seriously. I’ve met a lot of people online. I know their names, their spouse, what country/state they live in, where they went/go to school, what their job is, what they study, what classes their taking, but when I go back to say ‘hi,’ the reply is always: “who are you?”
If anyone ever sees Gilraen, Spellcasta/Spelcasta, or Dionysiah on Nazjatar, give them a link to this page for me.